What Makes Me ME, at this moment.

This probably isn’t uncommon for teenagers, but I’m sort of baffled by a very un-anchored personality.  Meaning, that although the concept of myself should be something defined and concrete, it’s more like a runny egg yolk.

I’ve long ago sort of half-accepted my amorphous sense of self, eventually finding virtues in being multifaceted and being able to compartmentalize.  However, I’ve suddenly noticed that over the years I’ve developed a few constants: things that I consistently identify with and attribute to myself.  🙂

So I decided to make a photo-based post about some of them.  In no particular order:

pencil bag and pen

My VB Pencil Case and Purple Pen

These have been steady companions during Junior year, and they reflect some of my favorite things: flowers and the color purple, passions that I doubt will leave me any time soon.

I’ve started using liquid eyeliner since 2013 as my first major experimentation with makeup.  A pretty pretentious and dumb first step to take, to be honest; if you’re not aware, liquid eyeliner is hard to manage (and TBH my acne should probably be a more pressing concern).  It might sound girly and petty, but I don’t really care: wearing eyeliner is one of the best decisions I’ve made in my young life.  The overuse of makeup deserves to be called out, I guess, but sometimes I think makeup wholly deserves its glorification.  It’s a real confidence boost.  Especially in the case of eyeliner, which doesn’t cover up, but rather allows an outlet of…creative expression, I daresay?

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The table in my backyard

This is such a lovely poolside spot to study and relax; not as relaxing as my bed, but this table has an important role of not putting me in a nap-coma.  It has such a sense of serenity that I definitely want in my life, even as my parents sell this house after I leave for college.  My favorite things to do here is look at the trees and the birds flitting around.

spotify:user:1251840494:playlist:1OJi37SvL24cakIFt7ztXZ

My “Perf” Playlist

My three-ish years as a faithful and constant spotify user (as you can tell by my monthly music faves), has resulted in this behemoth 78 hour, 24 minute playlist, with everything from Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok” to Dvorak’s “New World Symphony.”  It is my life.

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My lockscreen of ~9 months

I identify with this because of my quasi-narcissistic princess mindset, my love of dogs, and passion for feminism.

gold nail polish

Gold Nail Polish

I tried this color once and haven’t donned a different shade since.  It’s actually technically “Copper Penny,” not gold, but the effect is the same: in short, it makes me feel powerful.

Well, this ended up being kind of a weird post, but I hope it sorta gives you a peek into what I’m like.  See you next week!

M.L.

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